I hope it goes without saying, but your limitations are not mine. Like every human being, I’ve defined what’s possible for me. Despite lots of comfort-zone-stretching experiences, I’m sure that my definition is still too limiting. I consider the exploration of my limits and establishing them in the proper places is part of my mission as a human being. I really don’t need or want anyone else to extrapolate their limits onto me. What I think happens is that people need reassurance, confirmation that their limits are ‘right’ or ‘just’ so they project them onto the world around them.
This is possible. That isn’t.
Now, I believe that I can learn to do almost anything. I might need lots of practice or a lifetime of study, but I can learn to do it at a reasonably adept level. This doesn’t mean that I will, only that I can. The difference between accepting responsibility for myself and avoiding it with I can’t is the difference between personal freedom and imprisonment. Of course, I probably don’t have enough time to learn how to do EVERYTHING, but there are very, very few things that I cannot do.
While focusing on this difference might seem petty and insignificant, any reasonable analysis of the language will end, I think, in the very obvious conclusion that “I can’t” bounds the self up, closes doors, and reduces options, while the “I choose…” empowers the self, opens doors (or at least windows) and generally creates more options. Of course, there are times when I can’t is absolutely appropriate…just not very often.
Which brings me to your limitations. I will not accept them. When you say, “I can’t” I understand that very clearly to often mean I don’t know how and/or I’m terrified to step outside the comforts of my limitations to learn, which I’m totally OK with. Like I said, there are plenty of things that I choose not to learn how to do for whatever reason. I want you to do be happy and healthy so please consider owning your choices. It just might open up options you never knew existed.
So next time you hear yourself saying or thinking I can’t, consider the possibility that you’re not being completely honest with yourself.